Ayres Insanity

    I don't always dream, and I don't  always remember them clearly when I do have them, but when it's a happy dream I'm super grateful when I wake up thinking about it. Last night I dreamed about grandma. I've had a couple of dreams about her since she passed and it always makes me smile.     It's weird because I rarely dream about my dad, I wish I did because I really miss him too, and he left me with so many questions that it'd be nice if he checked in once in a while, but I guess he must have a full schedule on the other side.     Anyway, I'm grateful that I was able see grandma for a bit last night. She looked so beautiful, still like a grandma, but not as old and frail as she was at the end. As soon as I saw her I ran and gave her the biggest hug, it was funny because I offered to have her stay at my house (she must have known that we sold hers), but she declined because my house was too full of noise and chaos, I get tha...

    Yesterday we went to a get-together with the the people from my pathways gathering, it was nice to meet in person with these people that I had thus far only interacted with online. As we chatted, one person in our group revealed that he is afraid of dogs. He owns a pest control company and has been bitten a few times while being in peoples homes, I guess I can understand his reservations, but it's hard for me to wrap my head around the idea of not liking animals. I was raised with them and as a general rule, I like most animals.     Something I've learned about myself over the years is that although I love animals, I'm pretty picky about the kind I will have as pets. We are dog people around here, well for the most part anyway, Taevin is a cat person, but I think the rest of us prefer dogs.       I don't love having big dogs in my house, I prefer their temperment to small dogs but the sheer size is too much in this already crazy...

     Russ has worked a graveyard shift almost our entire marriage, and for much of that time he has held a second job as well. Most days he leaves around 5:00 pm, goes to both jobs, and comes home around 7:20 the next morning.      I couldn't be more grateful for a husband who values hard work and does what it takes to support our family, but I don't love being alone at night, and I worry about him. I pray every night that he will be brought home safely to me in the morning, and I always breathe a subconscious sigh of relief  every morning when I hear the garage open.      I am usually up and getting the kids ready for school by the time he gets home, but sometimes on the weekends when I don't have to get out of bed, he crawls in next to me and somehow manages to stay awake long enough to cuddle for a while, and this is the best part of my day.

    What a year! It's almost over so I figured a recap was in order.    Taevin is 15, he's had his learners permit since January and has become a pretty decent driver. He'll be turning 16 and getting his license in about 3 weeks, and is so excited! I'm excited to have someone to run my errands for me, but the doubling of my car insurance... not so much.  He's in the middle of his sophomore year, he doesn't love school work, but what teenager does? He does work hard though and has amazing friends, and a crush named Maddie who lives in Highland. He still loves to run and is playing the Cello in chamber orchestra.   Ryler turned 13 in November and it's weird to think that I have 2 teenagers! He is in 7th grade and playing the trumpet in band. He gets good grades and loves to be outside with his friends as much as possible. He definitely loves his mama and for the most part is helpful and sweet.   Zoey is in 4th grade and really enjoys schoo...

      My sweet grandma Whitney passed away this year. It was on November 10th, Ryler's 13th birthday. We knew it was coming, she'd been declining for a while, and it had gotten to the point that we were all praying that Heavenly Father would bring her home to her husband. It was just time.   It's been about 7 weeks now, I miss her, and it was weird not spending Christmas Eve at her house, but I'm so grateful to know that she's happy and reunited with my sweet grandpa. I'm grateful for the amount of time I got to spend with her throughout her life, and the spirit I felt as I sat at her bedside at the very end. Death is hard for those of us left behind, but the knowledge that is isn't permanent brings peace.  I was asked to speak at her funeral, so here is the talk I gave. It’s been nearly 27 years since I stood at a pulpit much like this one, sharing a tribute about grandpa. Now I only bring this up because it’s almost impossible to talk about one without me...

  My last post was in March. It was the beginning of the "pandemic" as people are calling it, but over the last several months, it has become alarmingly clear that our country is changing, and not in a way that anyone ever expected or wanted. America used to stand for freedom, and we were proud of that, but this virus has been used by people and politicians as a means to get gain & power, defy the constitution and steal the freedoms of the American people. The COVID-19 virus, although real and somewhat dangerous, has become a modern-day secret combination.    Here in Utah, and several other states, we are being forced by tyrannical governors to mask our faces, despite the massive scientific evidence that they not only are ineffective in preventing the spread of this disease or any other, but are highly detrimental to both the physical and mental/emotional well being of people. The survival rate of COVID patients is 99.97% as of the last s...

  Just so I NEVER forget... This is what is going on in our world right now, and one day it will be a story I tell to my grandkids, like the way my grandma talks about the the way she remembers the great depression or WWII. We are making history, and I want to remember the good & the bad.  Gas price a mile from home was $2.35 School cancelled - We are all home/ online schooling Gyms - closed!  Social distancing measures on the rise. Tape on the floors at grocery stores and others to help distance shoppers (6ft) from each other. Limited number of people inside stores, therefore, lineups outside the store doors. Non-essential stores and businesses mandated closed. Parks, trails, entire cities locked up. Entire sports seasons cancelled. Concerts, tours, festivals, entertainment events - cancelled. Weddings, family celebrations, holiday gatherings - cancelled. Churches are closed- this is also being done at home. No gatherings of 50 or more, then 20 or mor...